tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-184642052011-12-14T18:52:49.248-08:00seeking and finding grace in everday momentsMelly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.comBlogger891100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1171046322408576742007-02-09T10:35:00.000-08:002007-02-09T10:38:42.426-08:00

Just finished up the show Saints and Sinners for FOX. It will supposedly air in March on Wednesdays. I'll keep you posted. I am on my way to New Mexico to shoot the training video called "BOOM". It will not have a release as it is to help army garrison commanders train for emergency situations. I think it will be way cool. I am working with some peeps that I have worked with in the past.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1170537740855996482007-02-03T13:17:00.000-08:002007-02-03T13:22:20.870-08:00

I am down to the last few days of work on the show. I am both excited and nervous. In my mind, I think things like...will I find work again, what will I do for money to take care of my responsibilities..stuff like that. I have to calm down and trust. Relax.Good news!! I have been paid for a job I did at Christmas time, and that allows me to pay off my credit card (the one I used to buy my

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1170394655848850402007-02-01T21:33:00.000-08:002007-02-01T21:37:35.856-08:00

So, the show I am working on is going to air on FOX. It is an english speaking telenovella. Way dramatic, and reminds me a bit of Melrose Place. LOTS AND LOTS of DRAMA! I have been working in the wardrobe department. It was a big departure from what I was used to but I have grown accustomed to it. It is always good for me to learn new skills, you can never know "too much". That is one

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1170298752899429032007-01-31T18:58:00.000-08:002007-01-31T18:59:12.916-08:00

It has been awhile, but I am back....ready to do a daily journal. WHY? Because I like it. TBC

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1147702436655149062006-05-15T07:10:00.000-07:002006-05-15T07:13:56.666-07:00

Howdy! Been awhile. I got the job. I will be heading out to LA in a week. There is alot of stuff to get done in that time. I am certainly excited but now the nerves are kicking in. In my mind I wonder if I am ready for this. This is the biggest job yet and lots of pressure. I guess we will see. Pray....thanks and I will write on the flip side. Sunny So Cal.peace to you,Mel

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1146795198866738582006-05-04T19:09:00.000-07:002006-05-04T19:13:18.876-07:00

I saw this at the blog Church of the Masses and heartily agreed: Beauty in the film industry is "not cute or easy or nice," she said. It is complex. In addition to having good characters, conflict and visuals, a beautiful film will give viewers the sense that it is complete and that they have learned something.A beautiful film "gives you something that becomes part of your framework, and you

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1146768787636949932006-05-04T11:34:00.000-07:002006-05-04T11:53:07.646-07:00

HOWDY GANG!I am just 3 shooting days away from wrapping this film project called 100MPG. It has been quite a ride, let me tell you. Now on set, I try to mantain a calm so that the people around me will feel comfortable and do their best work. I just find that the more calm I stay the easier things flow. When I get stressed--it has happened a few times in just the past few days---it does rub

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1146194147575354062006-04-27T20:12:00.000-07:002006-04-27T20:15:47.586-07:00

Well that guy who said there might be something open on his crew, has to check with his PM (production manager). The PM will decide if he can bring me on. So I wait....and hope I don't drive myself crazy in the mean time!peace out.mel

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1146058112345458212006-04-26T06:15:00.000-07:002006-04-26T06:28:32.373-07:00

Daddy, relieve my worry but let's say I still choose to do it. Help me carry it.________________________________________________________Ok, today I work at the bank for half a day then I shoot 2 scenes tonight. These are called "steals" since they were originally on the schedule for another day but because the some of the talent (3 of the cast) flaked and committed to another project too (with

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1146034917715642112006-04-26T00:01:00.000-07:002006-04-26T00:01:57.733-07:00

So part of my job entails listening to the rantings of various crew members. This can be challenging. I am meant to listen but somehow not carry it with me. Some days I find that easier than others. It is that delicate blend of not letting people put their opinions "on" me but still being symapthetic and trying to mediate. God give me the grace because I am just not always up for the task.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1145599386167512062006-04-20T23:01:00.000-07:002006-04-20T23:03:06.176-07:00

I need patience. To be patient with people. Boy, despite the busy-ness I REALLY like what I am doing lately. Do you think God meets us even when we are so insanely busy all we can do in a day outside of work is sleep...

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1145470537611468452006-04-19T11:11:00.000-07:002006-04-19T11:16:47.340-07:00

Right now I am sitting in a coffee shop, drinking water and answering emails. I haven't had this much free time in weeks. Have you ever been so busy, life seems to be moving faster than you can intake it? There is just so much. It is nice to have a bit of "downtime".I thought I should pass on some news that a week ago I got some training from a working 1st AD (who lives and works in LA). He

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1145337654295437042006-04-17T22:16:00.000-07:002006-04-17T22:20:54.310-07:00

Hey Gang!Been a while since I have written. Working on the film 100MPG, it was going to be a simple class project but once we had Mark Medoff signed on, it became a bigger deal. He is a very wonderful director. My role in this project is as a 1st AD, but in the next few days I will be moving on to 2nd AD to give other people in class to have a chance.I have been busy but enjoying myself and

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1144094115710970182006-04-03T12:54:00.000-07:002006-04-03T12:55:15.723-07:00

get on the crazy bus...MORE LATER!peace.mel

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1143444384209209602006-03-26T23:24:00.000-08:002006-03-26T23:26:24.210-08:00

I don't think life was meant to just sit and observe but to engage and LIVE. What does that look like?

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1143358270955381212006-03-25T23:26:00.000-08:002006-03-25T23:31:10.970-08:00

too lazy to type it. I warned ya that I have this lazy streak and it is out full force...except for the fact I have alot on my plate with school and projects but on the flip side I like to just be at home lately. I don't know if it is isolating but just enjoying having 'alone moments'. They can be nice sometimes.I am having a few challenges in some friendships with people from school and me

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1143189238326170422006-03-24T00:28:00.000-08:002006-03-24T00:33:58.336-08:00

Well, I am going to ask for prayer to be wise in how I invest in the next "big" purchase I am soon to make. Recently, because of school and some of the responsibilities in filmmaking I have, it has come to my attention I may need my own computer. You see, the thing is that I am not working on a regular basis, instead doing temp jobs here and there for a little income so a purchase like this is

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1143083275786192652006-03-22T19:06:00.000-08:002006-03-22T19:10:44.170-08:00

The Bickle Family.Check it out. please.love ya,mel

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1143011222326055542006-03-21T22:46:00.000-08:002006-03-21T23:07:02.350-08:00

I thought I would post a little something while I am waiting for my clothes to dry. I really should be going to bed at a normal hour but I kind of want to stay up late and get up early (for my temp job at the bank-last day for this assignment is tomorrow) like in the old days. It is funny but when I hit 31 last year something in my body cannot pull an all-nighter or even a late-nighter. For

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1142700839916439342006-03-18T08:43:00.000-08:002006-03-18T08:53:59.936-08:00

So I got through the week shooting at a house that had 4 cats. Needless to say I am allergic to cats so by the end I could barely get through a take without sneezing. All in all I thought the week went well. There was the typical stuff you face: people calling in with no notice, technical difficulties, our inexperience, etc. but I am proud of my crew. The moments they did irritate me it was

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1142488535875655102006-03-15T21:49:00.000-08:002006-03-15T21:55:35.890-08:00

Here is a big confession from me: I want to be perfect, and have people think I am perfect. And yet with my brain, I know that is not true and I don't carry myself like I think I am all that. What is that about?Tonight I had a little complaining moment and afterwards I thought, 'I shouldn't have done that, what does that guy I work with (on a film project) think of me..that I am a big whiny

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1142432446701726112006-03-15T06:10:00.001-08:002006-03-15T06:24:28.440-08:00

Been real busy shooting the 3rd scene of four that were slated for March. My role in this whole thing is coordinating, moving things along, problem solving, keeping up team morale...all the things I like to do. Plus it is in a creative area like filmmmaking. One important trait is to always keep your cool on set. Even when every one else is freaking out, you stay calm. It does alot to mellow

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141796717276484442006-03-07T21:37:00.000-08:002006-03-07T21:45:17.286-08:00

I see the little things that I need grace for, and I am glad that it is given. I always find it much easier to be compassionate to others but when it comes to myself I think somehow I imagine I am not worthy of it. I think the more that time passes and I see more of who God is (not just my picture of him)--that thought tumbles away under his love.Right now I am so thankful for the many, many

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141755940930027822006-03-07T10:24:00.000-08:002006-03-07T10:25:40.946-08:00

Major personal procrastination but staying busy in life. Weird.not a whole lot to say. feeling "internal" today. QUIET.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141696217079880082006-03-06T17:38:00.000-08:002006-03-06T17:50:17.100-08:00

Well, I have been doing some odds and ends class training to work as an AD (assistant director) . This will be a continual process as there is alot to learn. My real desire is to one day have some camera time but for now I will do this since I do enjoy it and I find it suits my love of helping and people-oriented. Last week was a busy one, I put together a crew to shoot a scene for an acting

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141634494504871442006-03-06T00:33:00.000-08:002006-03-06T00:41:34.526-08:00

Please don't hide from me. Please let me be a friend. How do I reach out and not retreat?I wish so badly that my friendship meant something to you. That it was valued. I am not sure it is. Could I be overreacting, maybe, but honestly it hurts . So I say it, and move on. God I don't want to run. I want to stay firmly planted. I fear. I doubt. I am swayed by my own insecurities.Thanks for

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141537748575387462006-03-04T21:49:00.000-08:002006-03-04T21:49:08.586-08:00

Kyle's Film: Money Talks ($800)These guys are trying to put together this beautiful expression of God's grace and beauty told through visual story. Read this post, and if you can help...PLEASE DO!

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141536680067815282006-03-04T21:24:00.000-08:002006-03-04T21:36:49.590-08:00

I was over at Steve's blog (Tableserver) and saw this:Fear Not Don't be afraid to imagine the absolute best things about God and man. It's better than you have been led to think.good stuff...peace

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141525009076658282006-03-04T18:15:00.000-08:002006-03-04T18:16:49.093-08:00

Making them is very humbling.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141489179658679892006-03-04T08:13:00.000-08:002006-03-04T08:19:39.670-08:00

I was very emotional, in fact, I had a very intense lonliness despite the fact I was with people all day. My days have been full to the brim with meetings and such being a 1st AD for a class project (an AD is just some one who hammers out the day to day stuff to get the movie shot-works closely with the director). I think I find it odd to have lonely feelings surrounded by people. It must be

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141399835230177332006-03-03T07:22:00.000-08:002006-03-03T08:54:13.613-08:00

I am reading an auto-biography by Johnny Cash called Cash. A few thoughts run through my mind:**faith is an interesting thing**being a christian is not a "sunday school life"**where darkness is, the light always follows**love does really cover a mulitude of sins (as Paul put it)**I wonder what June saw in him to risk her heart to be with him despite it all--because at the time he was deep into

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141372765081241792006-03-02T23:45:00.000-08:002006-03-03T08:53:36.776-08:00

Well, I have an complex friendship brewing with a guy that I find so easy to be around, he is also interested in film-making. There are moments when my mind entertains thoughts of "what if". Yet, it isn't that easy, is it ever....people are human. He has this part of his life that I just can't connect with. He uses drugs recreationally. In my heart, I see him in ways that make no sense.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1141142067989615792006-02-28T07:48:00.000-08:002006-02-28T07:59:52.933-08:00

There is a very cool blog where the writer is making a film to honor and represent Kyle Lake's last sermon. Check it outAlso, here is a person's road of faith and the choices one can face. A Playgirl no-showSo the script that Dan is working on for the class project is in 3rd revision, it is coming along really well. I am a novice to this part of the processs so it has been good to see it (from

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140795379955002802006-02-24T07:29:00.000-08:002006-02-24T07:36:19.966-08:00

Currently I am reading a book called To Own a Dragon by Donald Miller. He writes a very personal book about what it was like growing up without a dad and how God has been teaching him about the love of a father with certain men in his life, namely Jon MacMurray. I think this book is great. As I read it this morning, it made me cry because I just very much get what he feels and has felt. It

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140569015810406212006-02-21T16:42:00.000-08:002006-02-21T16:43:35.823-08:00

No matter what it looks like, I want to live with a purpose but not for acceptance but out of love for others.Yes, please.peace.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140500819292594762006-02-20T21:45:00.000-08:002006-02-20T21:46:59.293-08:00

Just had to drop this post in so you could go look at one adorable baby! As I posted before Blake and Amanda had thier baby on Feb7, and he is the cutest! Take a peek! HERE

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140500019933681772006-02-20T21:19:00.000-08:002006-02-20T21:38:04.290-08:00

I get such a kick out of reading other people(s) blogs. I spend time each day "checking in" with folks from all over the place. Each and every person has such a different perspective of life and I think people sometimes write the words I think but can hardly express. I can't say I know these people but I can say there is a sense of friendship (in an online-might-

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140375024109059532006-02-19T10:47:00.000-08:002006-02-19T10:50:24.120-08:00

Why is it so hard to reach out to people. To be vulnerable.Vulnerability...love and grace....to not be perfect and let someone see that side of you. To receive love.God, show me where my perceptions are twisted.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1140274478053677682006-02-18T06:47:00.001-08:002006-02-18T10:23:03.960-08:00

My blogging has been inconsistent because I am keeping myself busy. I find that the "people" around me like when I am busy, it seems to elavate my worth versus if I spend alot of time reading or whatever. Why is that? Is that just a perception I have? Part of me doesnt think so because now that I am more "active" less people tell me "get a job" or "what are you going to do with the rest of your

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1139587790250179312006-02-10T07:59:00.000-08:002006-02-10T08:09:50.266-08:00

Today I noticed that as I get up, I have nothing to do. Well, other than a phone call and run to the store later. My natural response and also that of those around me is that I fill my day. Keep it busy because surely if I am not busy than I am a lazy person. (this is especially hard for me since I can actually be quite lazy sometimes)--- I really want to take a breather. Rest. That is the

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1139416562514672582006-02-08T08:30:00.000-08:002006-02-08T08:38:05.110-08:00

So we have started the first class project and it is titled 100MPG. It is a docudrama/true story about a young man named Tom Ogle who created (and patented) a device which would get 100 miles per gallon. It would have revolutionized the industry. However, four years later he is broke and dead from an overdose. We are seeking to explore "what happened?" (hopefully filling in some of the blanks).

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1139038514706304652006-02-03T23:23:00.000-08:002006-02-03T23:35:14.716-08:00

This week I have been so busy, partially I have made it that way. Filling each little moment of time other than sleeping hours. Well, today, Jesus had me stop and relax tonight. I was driving to get some dinner over at a local chicken place (Pepe's Chicken). I glanced over and saw a homeless man by the road, his cart and all. It came instantly to mind, " I want to get that guy something to

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1138940893538457622006-02-02T20:18:00.000-08:002006-02-02T20:31:21.013-08:00

Well, I had a really weird thing happen. I got an invite to go to a movie at a cool art house theatre. Then I gave the days I could go. We planned for tuesday, only to find out his fam was in town and he couldnt go. Then I say, ok, stuff happens...wednesday then. Oh wait, he emails and says that he is stuck at the dealership trading in his car. Strike two on the "go to the movie plans". I go

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1138692148355477762006-01-30T23:08:00.000-08:002006-01-30T23:24:57.126-08:00

There is something God put in my heart where I now see and feel when I am "squashing" Him. When I treat Him like my "little imaginary friend" instead of the wonderfully, amazing, loving Father that He is. He shows me. Despite the fact I am so loved by Jesus, it is my belief that in that love He corrects me. It isnt mean or oppressive to me. It feels safe. I know that His motive is not to

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1138253713963113392006-01-25T21:26:00.000-08:002006-01-25T21:35:13.990-08:00

Went and saw Derailed tonight. My thoughts: Good thriller, great twist, Clive Owen is always good however Jennifer Aniston...to put it kindly, not so good. Pretty out of her element. I think her strength is rom com certainly not intense drama!I am working at the bank again tomorrow, they requested me and I am kind of looking foward to it. Not the office work part but the part where I get to

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1138172395694385832006-01-24T22:47:00.000-08:002006-01-24T22:59:55.706-08:00

I am stressed inside. Not sure why. There is some unrest. Maybe it is all the "free time" and not enough of putting my heart into something meaningful. You see, I have these little ideas and I don't run with it because I worry, "What if it doesn't work out, then people will judge my decisions and think I am wack-o". Between you and me, people already think I am different and don't agree with

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137999837132015852006-01-22T22:56:00.000-08:002006-01-22T23:05:14.530-08:00

I don't have a whole lot to say tonight. Well, one thing does come to mind, keep my friend B in your thoughts, his little doggie died on Sat. It was his best friend and he is feeling the loss.I was going to work on a documentary in Mexico for the next 3 weeks (while doing the school thing on Saturdays)...and as sometimes happens, the gig fell through. I am a bit disappointed but there is more

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137897914764679892006-01-21T18:40:00.001-08:002006-01-21T18:47:38.526-08:00

Today was my first day back after about 7 weeks. I am glad, the break seemed WAY too long!Training in safety procedures, OSHA stuff to get into the local 480 (IATSE). Union is the only way to go in the film industry, otherwise you take your chances. I found out with this semester and 15 days set experience on a feature, I can be grafted into the union. Good deal. Except the part it costs 600.00 a

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137817116452476712006-01-20T20:10:00.000-08:002006-01-20T20:47:43.980-08:00

I go to other peoples blogs and sometimes I stumble on really cool stuff. Well at this one, I got the priviledge of hearing about a remarkable man named Kyle Lake. He was passionate, devoted, and faithful. The people around him were blessed to know him (my gathering from all who talk so fondly of his life). I don't know exactly why but this particular story has touched my heart...THIS ONE. KYLE.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137803356680070872006-01-20T16:23:00.000-08:002006-01-20T16:29:16.690-08:00

Live for right now. The present. Not the past and not the future. Breath deep. God thanks so much for loving me even though I am a mess of jumble thoughts, ideas, goals, opinions, insecurities, dreams, likes, etc....Lately I have been more materialistic than I have been in the past. I am not sure why. God show me, and not only that help me to see the world is about more than meeting my needs

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137685739434949202006-01-19T07:34:00.000-08:002006-01-19T07:48:59.446-08:00

Meeting with two people from class to work on a treatment for a short film we want to do together for the class. Very Twilight Zone before it went wonky. I don't know if I am a good screenwriter since most of what I do is very stream of consciousness. We shall see.New things, while I really like them always fill me with a nervous energy...some more than others. Last night, as I went to sleep,

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137647717875579682006-01-18T21:10:00.000-08:002006-01-18T21:15:17.886-08:00

It was just plain fun. I had a few moments of nervous energy but for the most part it was good. I like the idea that I was not so worried about the outcome, just enjoyed each moment. No matter what happens it was good to spend the day with a fun person. Being as real as one can be meeting and getting to know someone new.So, yeah, thanks God for a fun-filled day...and thanks for loving me

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1137522735915702152006-01-17T10:13:00.000-08:002006-01-17T10:32:15.926-08:00

I am having coffee with a young man named Mark tomorrow. 10 AM. Let's just say I am a bit nervous. Haven't had a date in a long while. I can tell certain things in me are changing because I don't stay self-conscious for as long, IF it happens at all. I think more of what I am feeling is a nervous energy. Being excited. I really want to stay true to who I am. Be real. Think of this as

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1136349493932438662006-01-03T20:36:00.000-08:002006-01-03T20:38:13.946-08:00

Heading to SD for 5 days to spend time with my little bro during his birthday. He is 16 this year! I remember him being born...wow, can't believe it. That's rad. Please pray for him because his life has been hard and full of struggles. Thanks.See ya on the flip side.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1136310244458301902006-01-03T09:35:00.000-08:002006-01-03T09:44:04.466-08:00

Do you ever have days where instead of resting in the perfect love and peace of God, you keep striving to achieve this goal of being the "perfect person". Then you get caught up in this cycle of relax, trust, strive, fail at being perfect, feel really bad about it, mope for days or some length of time, then repeat....Where does that come from?The really cool thing is I have these moments of

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1136222403145799792006-01-02T09:13:00.000-08:002006-01-02T09:20:03.156-08:00

Anger is an interesting emotion and one I have not mastered. When I feel controlled, I let it get the best of me. One thing I am coming to realize is that in that very fact, I am trying to control. It isn't a good anger, it is a dominating, fear based, suck-all-of-the-love out of a room response. I don't like that. The only thing I can do is put out the effort to change and rest in the grace

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1135559853315481082005-12-25T17:09:00.000-08:002005-12-25T17:20:38.596-08:00

My how time flies when you are having fun (and not so fun!) heeheeI'll let you in on a little something, working in an office setting is not my cup of tea. How do I know this? Because this past week and next week I work 3 days each in a bank (the trust dept.). To me there is nothing more boring than filing and alphabetizing. I am trying to keep a good outlook about it though. Being grateful

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1134819757739861692005-12-17T03:39:00.000-08:002005-12-17T03:42:37.746-08:00

I need to release control. Please Jesus, help me with that. You after all probably gave my the notion I even have that tendency. My control is out of fear. On a lighter note, the Patriots play a very important game today. Against the TB Bucs. Here's hoping they clinch the division and move into the playoffs. Doing the very thing the silly sportcasters said they couldn't do with all the

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1134516402850455492005-12-13T15:22:00.000-08:002005-12-13T15:26:42.866-08:00

(Writing from Dad's...short post)I am having a really good time. There are moments when I feel like my Dad and I were never apart and other times when I think...this is weird. But a good weird. I like that I have this chance to know my Dad. To see him for who he is and love him. Not "in spite of" but "for who he is". I don't have to agree with everything he does either...loving is deep

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1133870271206799342005-12-06T03:52:00.000-08:002005-12-06T03:57:51.216-08:00

Well, I have been busy and not able to stop in for an update. Sometimes I miss it because even if it is just a small blurb it gets something out of my mind and in "the real".I am headed to my Dad's tomorrow morning for a 7 day holiday. That is the longest I have spent with him at one time in my life. Wish me well with that. Talk about looking for grace! Also, doing some pick-up shot in

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1133641027152590102005-12-03T12:08:00.000-08:002005-12-03T12:20:11.960-08:00

Today I took my final, I did ok...I think. Not great and not bad. The thing that kills me is that I have worked in film before and some of the "easier" questions I missed. A tad embaressing and maybe that is what bugs me. How I will appear...'Mel, who has worked in production does mediocre on a test, what's wrong with her?' Ahhhh, my mind at work. When will I allow grace to be complete. Not me

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1133324406834534982005-11-29T20:15:00.000-08:002005-11-29T20:20:06.843-08:00

ROME WASN'T BUILT IN A DAY...'Nuff said there.I really like pumpkin pie with whip cream. Turkey is ok but the stuffing is what I dig more. Who can resist the sweet potatoes with the crunchy pecan stuff on top. Yum. Sorry about that, having flashbacks of a great thanksgiving meal. God you are such a superb provider. Thanks for that.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1133295188704438932005-11-29T12:02:00.000-08:002005-11-29T12:13:08.713-08:00

So here it is, a confession...hoping it is good for the soul. Or at least, good for healing. I signed up for this site called christian mingle. It is a christian singles website. I was having fun with it...chatting and talking with guys from all over. Even met 2 that I still stay in contact with though there is no potential for romance. The thing is, it is alot of fun, until the guy decides

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132931821916525282005-11-25T07:08:00.000-08:002005-11-25T07:18:33.446-08:00

My dad invited me to check on flights to come see him for the holidays. For those of you that don't know, this is huge. Before this year I hadn't seen my dad since high school (about 13 yrs ago). Needless to say the connection has been restored. We are trying to stay in touch and develop some sort of relationship as dad/daughter. It is still so new. Very tentative and HOPEFUL!Hope you all had a

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132758593379851712005-11-23T07:01:00.000-08:002005-11-23T07:09:53.390-08:00

So I have been going to this group meeting on Tuesday nights. Last night, I said what I thought at the end. I'll give you the short version:Me: "So what is up with just sharing? Isnt there anyone to give advice or tell me the best way to solve my problem?"Them: We think that it is good to listen. To allow people to share without feedback. The people come here tend to have issues with

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132554973949931182005-11-20T22:29:00.000-08:002005-11-20T22:36:13.960-08:00

I enjoy when good things happen...like couples getting engaged! Fellow blogger, Reid, announced his engaement to Bethany. I wish them the best.Check it out here.My first part of finals went well. I set up a camera and tripod, c-stands, and lighting package. Not perfectly but with some help. It was fun. I like my class alot. Looking foward to part 2 in the spring.What do you think of this picture?

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132326570085824332005-11-18T07:07:00.000-08:002005-11-18T07:09:30.093-08:00

We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist.But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us!But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation:Trust steadily in God, hope

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132170091601223892005-11-16T11:36:00.000-08:002005-11-16T11:41:31.610-08:00

I see the knots in my heart.God help me to not only see but to do things to change them...Perfectionism is a prison. I don't like being in it. I am complete unto myself. I dont need a man's approval to make me whole. I dont need a man to fufill me or my life's purpose. Never having my dad around made me really cling to men who came in and out of my life, as if my worth was wrapped up in them.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132144923584093022005-11-16T04:38:00.000-08:002005-11-16T04:42:03.593-08:00

The more life I live, the more I realize just how little I actually know. Weird.AND that is ok. I have said it before and I will say it again. Not knowing is ok. I am not perfect nor is that what life is about. The way I measure my life is skewed.God grant me the wisdom to see what is real and true.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1132000620395605892005-11-14T12:34:00.000-08:002005-11-14T12:37:00.403-08:00

So many things in this life can distract you...pressures...expectations...opinions. It is a wonder we can hold our head up with the weight of it all. Good news though, we aren't meant to carry that burden. We can make a choice to release it and walk free. What does that look like?I want to know...

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131900677658730432005-11-13T08:43:00.000-08:002005-11-13T08:54:55.356-08:00

Who decides what our value is?Does anyone have the right to tell another person they think they are beyond repair?What kind of fear, anger, rebellion, hard-heartedness would make one person say to another that they cannot handle who they are?I think it is time for people to "open" their eyes and start really looking at people (this is very much for me too!). I mean really taking the time to BE

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131854331309063092005-11-12T19:52:00.000-08:002005-11-12T20:00:11.453-08:00

This is a quote from a Nelson Mandela speech, it inspires me."Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131774826850819532005-11-11T21:49:00.000-08:002005-11-11T21:53:46.860-08:00

Today goes down in the books as one I will remember for awhile. Something very funny happened. It concerns a new friend, an email, and a best friend...mix all those things and hilarity ensues...I'll tell you all about it tomorrow after I get done with school. Trust me it is worth the wait, a good lesson came out of it to boot!

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131652704277748402005-11-10T11:54:00.000-08:002005-11-10T11:58:24.286-08:00

This is a post written by Rick over at A New Life Emerging, it says exactly what season of life God has me in...opening up, revealing, risking...being ok for people to see who I really am, the wonderful and the not so great bits.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Here ya go:Are you willing to risk being wounded?It seems that everything in

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131637092055696052005-11-10T07:29:00.000-08:002005-11-10T07:45:53.916-08:00

Over at Effortless Grace, Tom wrote a really good post. The topic really resounds with me because I often find myself afraid. Afraid of what happens when I live out my dreams and succeed! Recently, I have decided to just go for it. What is the worst that could happen, it just not work out? Well, nothing happens if I don't at least take that leap.Starting film school is a step. Walking out certain

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131574886601442242005-11-09T14:16:00.000-08:002005-11-09T14:21:26.610-08:00

I feel vague today. And complete. I am complete just as I am. That isnt saying I don't have more learning and growing to do or that I don't need anyone...that is not true. What is does mean is the way God made me is just fine. My validation comes from His opinion. Not anyone else, not even mine. I find alot of comfort in that.I want more of the moments that I trust and believe in who God

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131475825427765232005-11-08T10:45:00.000-08:002005-11-08T10:50:25.436-08:00

I made a statement in the last post that I hope peace comes soon. It just occurred to me, I already have been given it...so the choice to be made is accepting that gift. Jesus righted me with God, he redeemed me. I am starting to think, maybe, the problem isnt when will I achieve peace and freedom but when will I claim it for my own. To live in the belief it is already completed.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131433840101973032005-11-07T23:06:00.000-08:002005-11-08T07:07:01.313-08:00

I have nothing to say except I feel vulnerable. I am completely out of my comfort zone. However God, thankfully, is greater than my heart.How do you love someone for real when you go from dating to just friendship. I'm learning. Just for the record, it is hard work and doesn't come without some choice, determination, and courage. This person is worth it to me. I hope soon the peace will

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131256039068142292005-11-05T21:42:00.000-08:002005-11-05T21:47:19.076-08:00

Peace describes a condition rather than a demeanor. Peace is the result of salvation, which means that man and God are no longer at war. Peace describes the state of man after conversion. He is at peace with God. - Mike YaconelliWe're attempting to convince the world how good Jesus is by how great we are. This is precisely how Madison Avenue sells toothpaste, automobiles, and underwear. People

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131253537141926682005-11-05T20:53:00.000-08:002005-11-05T21:05:37.150-08:00

So today after class (which was very excellent, but that is another post) I talked to a friend about his life and what brought him to where he is at today. My thoughts were many as we talked. None of which were shock. I felt sympathy, relief, gratitude, fear...really so many things. Let's just say he has been through a life of drugs, jail, despair and much more. But for God's grace he really

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131120975975958362005-11-04T08:12:00.000-08:002005-11-04T08:16:15.983-08:00

Ever have one of those days where you just wish you could shut down your thought process for, let's say, a day....at least. I am. Lots of little thoughts just cluttering up my mind. Keeping me scattered.Today is a day to get in my VW bus and chill. Bring lunch, a book, and find a quiet spot.I think I will. Enjoy the day for what it has to bring. There is only one like it...peace.

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1131047249496473672005-11-03T11:32:00.000-08:002005-11-05T20:53:26.580-08:00

Conrad Hall was a man I deeply admired for his work in film. He was a cinematographer. There were very few people who could light a scene like he could. There was just the pure way about him, using shadows and natural light to portray a feeling or mood. Check out Road to Perdition, American Beauty, Tequila Sunrise, and Cool Hand Luke to get a small idea of what he could do as an artist. I had

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130963501156802452005-11-02T12:27:00.000-08:002005-11-02T12:35:30.940-08:00

I was checking out Reid's blog, today's post should stir up some interesting discussion. Check it out!

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130914554453810472005-11-01T22:47:00.000-08:002005-11-01T22:55:54.460-08:00

Just looking at this photo takes my breath away. I find Scotland the most lovely place I have ever been. This pic is of Moonan Bay, Isle of Skye. I was this close to going there but I was in the group that headed north to Dunnet Head. You won't hear me complaining though, Dunnet was just as amazing.Hopefully, one day I will get my chance to go there! *wink, wink to Jaynie*(credit for photo

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130864674063801672005-11-01T08:51:00.000-08:002005-11-01T09:23:21.323-08:00

This morning as I sit to write, my thoughts are many. I think to myself about all those "great" blogs out there that have inspired me and have so much to good stuff to say. Then that familiar voice pipes up and says "What do you have to offer? You have more questions than answers? People dont want to hear what you have to say."Here is the thing with that, I know it is bull. I know because God's "

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130802880208499232005-10-31T15:48:00.000-08:002005-10-31T22:00:51.350-08:00

Today I spent 4 hours waxing my Gabby's (my grandmother's nickname) car. My mind dwelled on a few things like:1) I really love my Gabby2) God is with us even in the most mundane, plain moments.3) There is a pleasure in putting your hand to a project and getting it done.4) The hard part is not in the starting, but the finishing!One last thing to mention, after a slow start "my Patriots" beat

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130772711954885172005-10-31T07:18:00.000-08:002005-10-31T11:08:07.070-08:00

Ok, so I have ended up auditing a film class at New Mexico State University. It is a general film production class. A basic look at each area of the filmmaking process. It really is a long story of how I stumbled on it, so I will leave it for another time or a 3 parter!The class is on Saturdays. I love it. The 3 weeks I have gone were: sound, cinematography, and lighting. This week is hair and

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130696414447471262005-10-30T10:17:00.000-08:002005-10-30T10:24:20.016-08:00

My childhood friend Wendy (who also helped me find my dad!) had a baby girl!"Adriana Danielle Graca made her entrance into the world at Tobey hospital todayOctober 29th at 12:18 PM. She is 21 1/2 inches long and weighs 8 lbs .6 OZ and she is very cute! " (email)Isn't she beautiful?

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18464205.post-1130695627640980052005-10-30T10:05:00.000-08:002005-10-30T10:07:07.640-08:00

I have wanted to start writing again. It will be a daily thing but short bits. Take a ride with me...to be continued...

Melly Hhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16790452451463301187noreply@blogger.com2